What it's like to return from an ex-pat assignment Part II

In this post....lost and blurry days, weeks and months

Catch up from end of summer to December 2014


End of summer, what a blurr...

Neighborhood friends catching the Valley View Bus!!

A fun day with cousins

 End of summer - Labor Day weekend at the lake.....

We had been warned.  We had been clearly clearly cautioned.  And yet, this returning home stuff still hits you like a rock.

Here we are, almost 6 months after returning home, and I can finally write with confidence to say that we are feeling settled.

It has taken that long.  Yes, that long.

People warned us and we anticipated unrest, anxiety, and a lot of work.  And although the physical challenges of moving home (returning to a house that needs a lot of work, unpacking, trying to organize your home and get connected back into sports and activities) were expected, it's probably the emotional aspects that surprised us a bit more.
The longing to return to what was in London.  The yearning for that other life.  The clarity of things in your home culture that drive you nuts.  The sadness as your kids' hearts are breaking because all their friends are in another country.  The knowledge that it is going to take quite some time before they build strong friendships here.  Not having any connections to activities, sports, routine, schools, jobs, church - anything - it all has to start over - even if you return to where you came from.

So let me rewind a bit.  I haven't written since July.  Oooops.  All that time has been consumed in adjusting to all those challenges and more mentioned in the previous paragraph.

We spent as much time as we could trying to connect the kids in various activities, church, sports and at school over the summer.  Taking off to our lake cabin every weekend helped us get away from that unsettled life not yet established.  We all agreed that the cabin felt more like home.  Our city home was empty - container not arriving until mid-August.  We had spent summers at our cabin, the kids and I, and it became a true second home for us.  It was complete.  Our city home was not complete.

Jonah took drivers ed, Josh enrolled in soccer camps, and Ally joined a swim club.  We spent a good part of a day getting a minivan, another day getting cell phones and service, another day joining a health club, and many days running errands to get those absolutely banal things that everyone has but that we just didn't have - like a pair of scissors, or brown sugar, or a cheese grater.

Container came August 8th.  Finally - our stuff - our beds, couches, tables, etc.  How nice to greet them again!  Right when I would have loved to be in New Zealand with the rest of my family (parents and sisters) who went to celebrate one of my sisters PhD achievements.  I did not get to go because of this move. Moving a family internationally makes you sacrifice a lot of things and it is a messy, messy, deal.  I recall going over to England feeling the same way.  Everything was a mess for at least 6 months, messy life, unsettled.  And now, reverse it all!

School orientations came early.  Mid-August brought multiple trips and meetings and orientations to the three different schools the kids would be attending.  We live in a wonderful public school district, but we had been spoiled by the private school experience at the American School in London.  The academic level might be very similar, but with small class sizes and staff who have the time to spend with students, that great public school system seemed pretty overwhelming and daunting to us now.

Apple orchard with the Larsons

September - full on school schedules, many house maintenance projects, Dave started a new job, I tried to reconnect with subbing and checking on the status of my teaching licensure.  We also began the process of exploring a business launch.

ELY in October:

Halloween fun with cousins

October - for MEA we went up to stay at my sister's in Ely.  Ely is a stone's throw from Canada and nature at its finest.

Finally getting to Deedee and Grandpa's house!!

November - the cold comes early snapping projects that should have been complete before snow was on the ground (like the underground dog fence and repairing the rotted egress window).  For Thanksgiving we hosted my in-laws and went up to the lake cabin for the weekend.

Cheering at the State CC meet

Six Months.  If you are moving internationally, I would say this is how long it takes to feel like you get to "normal".  Things are feeling normal now, but it's a new normal.  We really miss London, especially the people, the great school, Dave's job being a couple blocks from our house.

It's Christmastime here.  Each Christmas in London we traveled somewhere exciting.  The first year, to Switzerland and France (ski trip).  The second year, to Tenerife (exotic and warm).  The third year, to Italy with my in-laws (Rome, Florence, Venice...wow).  All of those trips will remain cherished memories and incredible pinch-me experiences.  Yet, we are simple, us Larsons, and this year, we will revel in the tree, the snow, the decorations now on display that had been in boxes since 2010.  Christmas songs playing continually, familiar Christmas foods, presents to exchange. We will appreciate every second we get to be with our extended families, whom we missed dearly while we were away, especially at Christmastime.

We're happy to be home.

Part 1 of What it is like to return after living abroad

In this post....life post-assignment

all your stuff...all wrapped up

we will all be quite happy when this big ole container arrives at our house stateside!

There has been a lag in posts because life becomes messy during a move.
Whether you are moving from one house to another within the same city, or moving across the world, moving is just messy and complicated.
It's much more than changing your address.  It's changing routines, changing surroundings, changing neighbors, utilities, activities....
When you move from one country to another, you also change cultures.  For us, coming from an international and mostly American area in London, the culture shock has not been overbearing.  However, the lifestyle shock certainly is.  As in, you mean I have to get in my car in order to do anything?  Even grab a cup of coffee, or pick up milk?  Yes, that is the kind of neighborhood we live in.  Sure, we could consider moving more urban.  In London, we didn't ever own a car.  We lived in central London, and having a car is a real pain.  You can walk everywhere, take the transport, or hire a car.  Not so here in the Minneapolis area!  We have returned to the home we left three and a half years ago.  We love this house (although it is quite tired and needs a lot of work, which is a different blog entry), love our neighbors, love our location.  So, it really makes sense for us to be here.
We moved out of London on June 20th.  Our children left with my parents, who had come to help us out in the past couple weeks, a few days earlier, on June 16th.  We were able to get back into the house on June 23rd.
So, here we are.
Back home.
We've got some temporary furnishings, and our items from storage.
Our sea shipment has passed through customs and is waiting in line for transport across the US to our home.
The kids are getting involved in some activities, and I am learning to spend lots of time in my car.
All is well.
We certainly are not settled, but each day is progress, and we're getting there.  Patience, patience!!

Day trip to Warwick Castle

Daytrip to Warwick Castle

in this post....a castle that is actually FUN for all

We've lived in England so long now that even castles are boring for the kids.  Yes it's a sad day when your kids actually complain that you're going to visit an amazing, historic, nothing-like-it-anywhere-in-the-USA real live castle.  Ho hum they say, we've seen all too  many.  They're all the same.

Well not this one!

Warwick Castle is owned by the Merlin Company, which owns other London sites such as the London Eye, Legoland, Madame Tussaud's and many others.  If you're living here for a while it may be worthwhile to purchase a Merlin pass:

http://www.merlinannualpass.co.uk/

The entire place is quite animated, with many impersonators and helpful workers.

The price of entry is expensive, but you can find 2-for-1 deals on certain rail ticket purchases (but you must print and bring a voucher with you).  Purchase tickets on-line for reduced rates also.

We did not visit any of the extra ticketed sites (dungeon, etc.) and brought a picnic which was lovely to enjoy in their gardens.

We really enjoyed the visit, especially the trebuchet launching, the mock sword fight, the Great Hall guided tour, and the bird show. 

Best of all, we spent the day with my sister Becca who was here visiting from New Zealand, along with her boyfriend Dylan.  

You'll want most of a full day to make it worth your while!

We took a train and then walked from the station.  It was a short walk and easy to find.

From their website:

Welcome to Britain’s Ultimate Castle! At Warwick Castle we try to deliver the Castle of your imagination, whether you’re a 6 year old princess or a 60 year old re-enactor we provide a fun, action packed day out for all the family. While we constantly work to keep experiences fresh we are always grounded by history and legend. So what makes a brilliant day out?

First, be the best!

Warwick Castle is not your average castle. It is full to the turrets with dramatic shows, interactive experiences, storytelling, demonstrations, activities and more. We learnt a long time ago that that our guests, the young and young at heart, want to do more than just look. They want to be part of the adventure.

Visit Warwick Castle and you will see great halls, beautiful landscapes; mournful dungeons and high towers - but you'll also see people having fun, laughing and being amazed. We have eleven hundred years of history, but also great battles, ancient myths, spellbinding tales, pampered princesses, heroic knights, Merlin's Dragon, and the dark Castle Dungeon.

http://www.warwick-castle.com/

In search of sun holidays from London

in this post - many Brits are looking for SUN holidays, year round...where can you go, that is not too far and too expensive, to get that essential vitamin D rejuvenation??

EGYPT April 2014

If you are looking for SUN and a near-guarantee warm weather holiday, you can't go wrong with the Red Sea coast resort towns of Egypt.  There is some political unrest in Cairo (at the time of writing this in 2014), but the beach resorts are safe and contained.  The flight is about 4.5 hours and there is only a one-hour time zone difference.

We were there April 11-18th and temperatures were in the 30's with sun every single day.

The people are very welcoming and warm, the food is delicious, and the beaches are amazing.

first day - exploration

the resort's waterslides are fun for all ages

lots of kitesurfing off the beach on windy days

we spent almost all day in our swim suits

more waterslide fun - the resort had 3 waterparks

ready for dinner 

mom ran into the photo at the last minute as this was a self timer

beach front

evening sunset after dinner and resort in background - beautiful!

17 pools at the resort!

Boat cruise - loading at Hurghada Marina

who is driving this sea vessel!??

this was the only time we left the resort

If you look closely you can see the dolphins - it was very exciting to watch them from the boat!

more dolphin watching

the highlight was coral reef snorkeling!!

so excited to jump in!!

amazing snorkeling

enjoying the roof-top boat views

loving the boat trip

Hurghada Marina

REAL LIFE HURGHADA photos, which I took from the bus to/from the Marina....very different from our little resort world!!

a cafe

Meat anyone??

stores?

a cool pyramid building

Egypt's construction boom has come to a screeching halt because of the political unrest; the majority of investors have pulled their funds because of the instability, which leaves a ghost town feeling in large areas where half-completed buildings stand as skeleton frames

which way?

we loved the a la carte restaurants - here at the asian themed restaurant

where shall I sit?

I'd like a nap here please

panorama beach view!

no lifeguard on duty...

fancy a beach ride?

great spot to get lost in a book

The snorkeling off of the beach at our hotel was also amazing - the freakiest fish we saw were lion fish. There were loads of angelfish, clownfish, butterfly fish, cornetfish, cube boxfish, and others we couldn't identify. At first Josh said he didn't want to go, but after giving it a try, we couldn't get him out of the water!!

About booking this trip:
We booked back in September with Thomson/First Choice holidays.  We booked Club Magic Life Imperial Kalawy near Hurghada, because it was all-inclusive for many watersports, there was also biking, yoga and pilates, and many sports activities.  The week prior to our departure, we were looking at our paperwork, and saw "accommodation Jaz Aquamarine", in small print.  I thought this referred to our section of the resort.  Calling to confirm our details before departure, I learned, horrified, that Thomson actually changed our resort location and we were booked at a totally different resort.  They claim they sent us an email in December.  Good heavens, if you change our resort you had better speak with me directly or send me something requiring a signature.  I was in absolute shock.  We tried to correct this but were told that Club Magic Life had cancelled their contracts with them.  I asked for some reimbursement for activities, but they would not provide any help at all.  Club Magic Life is a nicer and more expensive resort, but they would not reimburse us for anything because they say when they had to make the change, the 2nd resort was just as expensive.  We booked far in advance to ensure we could afford this holiday, and it is not our fault they made a change, so we are still upset about this downgrade.  Yes, it was an amazing vacation, but our expectations were higher, and we paid for a nicer resort originally, UGH!  DO NOT book with First Choice or Thomson unless you don't mind a change in resort.  All the Brits we met there were not impressed with the resort either.  Several people recommended Sensatori in Sharm El Sheikh over this one.  Learn from our mistake!